January 27th 2017

Man life is weird, serendipity is calling for attention in too many places for me to chase all of it, so I'm having to parse opportunity in a city where opportunity is out of fashion.  I'm keep thinking some of those opportunities are going to dry up, making it easier to pick what I'll chase.  I may even be able to pass some of them on to others.

I guess it's this 'networking' that all the MBA folks are all over.  It turns out that building a useful 'network' has a lot more to do with treating the people you meet like people, and not becoming a total hermit preventing you from meeting ANY people.  I also generally think of people I meet as friends, or potential friends, or cool acquaintances, or at least fellow travelers of this whole life thing, as opposed to 'networks', and that probably helps.  I mean webs are at least organic, did the 'business speak' term need to be that impersonal?

aside:

People generally have 'settled' on who their friends are at a given time, and only have so much Focus in their heads, so lots of potential friends never get quite get there.  Other friends become closer and than drift out to potential friends and back again, as life's journey strengthens and weakens the overlap in each of your lives.  I have known people who get upset that a 'former' friend stops making time for them, after marriage, or new job or whatev...don't fret, if life decides to overlap you again, there is way less of that 'getting to know you' awkwardness on the second or later go round! And now you have some free Focus to spend on new people and stuff!

end aside.

I mean, my health stuff leads me to being a partial hermit, and I still know enough people to be getting opportunities.  I don't know if deliberately targeting 'important' people is effective, but just carrying on and being interested in people, and what makes them tick as people, turns out to work great - without any strategic thinking and planning and stuff, the business guys impersonal 'network' sounds like way more work.

You don't have to figure out what people are going to lead to future opportunities, and rate who it's important to talk to at a given event, and make a big deal of it, and can just meet people on their own terms - that's way simpler.  And, life is weird and stuff, and it turns out that some of the people that don't look like they're important now, turn out that way later on...

It also turns out that some of the people that everybody thinks will be important down the road, are - but it's like a competition to get their time, so hard work.  Just treat the people you meet well, and life will just magically works out! - or not, life's like that.  But you might get an invitation to a much smaller event the 'important' person is at, from her brother that you took time to talk to cus he looked bored at the bigger gathering and stuff. Life is weird.

And if you like being a hermit that's cool as well - less opportunistic perhaps, but opportunity brings change, and potential disappointment, and anxiety, and distraction, and isn't everybody's cup of tea.  I just suffer from the 'not letting it get boring' thing, so am good with disappointment and distraction - prefer success and distraction, but it's that distraction thing that matters - (for any new readers, at least read the About and Glossary, or you'll miss stuff).

Anxiety seems to have got to a weird place in my head as well. I think part of it is that I have an unfortunately sharpened awareness that life isn't fair or kind or generous, while maintaining belief it's not cruel or vicious either - it just carries on doing what it does, leaving the emotions to the living, sentient beings, scurrying around this rock and following it's own rules.  I have issues with some of those rules, some times, but I get over it.

Nature is totally ruthless and has a bit of that viciousness stuff in it's tail, but human's have moved far enough beyond nature, that our systems don't require it (there seems to often be unpleasant persons who invite it in, and I'm looking at you Mr. Trump, but we don't require it). Random bad things definitely do happen, and sometimes to you and yours, but random possibility is really big data set that hurts my head to think about, let alone worrying about.

Preparing for likely outcomes seems a good plan, but not worry - and a fairly  narrow view of likely helps.  I seem to save worry exclusively to human relationships and interactions, not for stuff outside my control.   I mean, people talk about doing that 'outside your control' thing, but it seems to have actually happened in my head.  It's worth noting I've lost worry for the 'not human' things within my control as well, so it might just be brain damage stuff...

It's probably a good plan to worry a bit more than I do, about stuff like being able to feed and clothe myself, or keep a roof over my head, but I don't seem to be that fussed.  Like I said, it really might just be the brain damage stuff.  In a fair existence I'd have got super powers of some kind out of the 'pedestrian v car' thing at least, so maybe that is it, but fair doesn't seem to be one of the Fates rules.  India's Karma has some of that, and is a totally cooler concept than the Western western world's Fates...

I mean I quit my job, in the middle of a local downturn,  and am dealing with it sans sleepless nights or fret.  Maybe it's the open opportunities leading to open futures and a death grip like tenacity to see what good CAN happen down a particular road, while not expecting the best possible outcome.  It turns out the ice-cream place went out of business down some roads so the reality fails to match up with Haagen Dazs hopes some times - but one of the great outcomes of modern societal arrangements and the human progress encapsulated within, is there is always ice-cream with in a few minutes walk/drive (depending on your urban/rural lifestyle.) and probably cake as well!

On that note, I remembered I have some ice-cream in my freezer that I have a sudden hankering for...later...